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February 05, 2006
it has such a long time since i updated. too many things happened and its just too difficult to put every single words in here.
CNY was just SO great. met up with all my relatives and cousins. and we had a good chat. everyone had grown so much. NS men and driving license. took some photos and i'm glad grandma am okay now. she's much much more better. went to some friends house, and i really enjoyed it. went to liming's house, janice's , mr. tan and of course jiat's. had some smoking posing session. too lots of photos at mr. tan's house. and he's such a fatherly figure to me. i really do hope he find his partner real soon. (: drank some alcohol at jiat's house. and i went "DEAD". not exactly dead, but i threw up. everyone was high that night. liming and jiat went giddy. and pohyee and kitmey went UPPER
red. it was fun. but... not everything was.
met up with some friends for dinner with their families and my families. had a really good dinner and i realized i missed the fun we had those times. we used to go each other's house and had GREAT fun. it seems now that its so difficult to do that anymore. everyone was really tired on friday. so we didn't get to go someone's house. BUT, we still had fun and went walking around changi beach. its just too bad some guys couldn't come. i realized i hate the sea when it was in the night. in fact, i'm scared of it. i don't know. but i don't really dare to step onto the bridge over the sea. its kinda scary. my mind kept thinking of the bridge going off and i will just dropped into the dark and cold water. it frightened me out. and those 'friends' of mine just laughed at me. oh well.... but i'm not scared of it during daylight okay ? (:
i think that fatty ong sensed my unwilliness to do things in guides. i'm TRULY glad we had IRP on friday. this means that i could skipped guides for awhile. i did not do much things on friday guides. agnes mdm came. and nothing much happened. not much scoldings from her. one thing i'm kinda confused is that this year camp would only be 3 days 2 night. which is absolutely NOT FAIR. but i'm stil happy.
i'm having chest pains these few days. esp the two previous days. i couldn't breathe well and i truly thought i was dying. horrible feeling, but i'm feeling better today. i felt like throwing up. and mum thought i am pregnant. OH GAWD ! this just shows how much she trust me. YES. i'm really hurt by that. some friends of mother once told me my mother seems to care more about my bro then me. i never knew the impression of me on her is so BAD. so i'm outside mingling with street gangs and do some really DUMB stuffs such as SEX ?! please ! i'm super duper ultra hurt by those words. i'm your daughter and you just dont seems to understand me. you cared more about my brother, i don't care. at least you cared about me. at least some bit. but not this ! you don't even trust me. i just felt giddy and wanted to throw up. that means i'm PREGNANT ?! i just can't believe it.
wtf...i have been sleeping so much this weekends. yes, i'm so tired of everything. school is tiring me out. and family ain't doing much things to cheer me up. i have stopped thinking about those lovey dovey stuffs. valentines am coming. i'm tired of it. it makes no sense at all. they say your first love will always be the most memorable one of all.
maybe, but maybe not....school so tiring. family ain't better..
